TW: description of sexual abuse
Yesterday, Dee Parsons of The Wartburg Watch dropped a nuclear bomb in the #churchtoo wars. The latest scandal involves that of a highly-established pastor in the Presbyterian Church of America (PCA). You can read the account here.
My focus here is not so much on the coverage of the scandal, but rather the public crisis communication of the relevant parties, particularly Dr. Payne and the session of his church.
(In a Presbyterian church, the “session” is the boars of elders which includes “ruling elders” who make leadership decisions and “teaching elders” who are responsible for teaching and preaching.)
Overview of the facts of the case
When Dr. Payne was in his early 20s, he was a youth pastor at Christ Presbyterian Church and also was active in sports programs at a local Christian school. Additionally, he was a spiritual leader in an athletic-oriented missions organization involving soccer team.
In those capacities, he encountered a student, Elisha Boggs, who was also active in the school and the soccer-oriented mission. She was 17 years old; he was 23.
In his capacity, he was her mentor. He did give special attention to her and they became friends.
While she was in college, he contacted her, and they began correspondence. And that began a whirlwind tour where he proposed marriage and she accepted. They became engaged.
One can reasonably ask whether the relationship is abusive? Did he groom her? Is this innocuous?
I will be charitable here and say that, while Payne had no business being anything but her mentor while she was in HS, I will give him the benefit of a doubt: he is not being predatory at this point. The age difference of 6 years is slightly hair-raising, but it's not in the creepy range. She's in college; at least a year has elapsed since they were around each other; he has not stalked her.
Also, his interest in marrying her is laudable on its face, although at their age they (especially him) definitely need some pre-marital counseling.
But it goes downhill from there. And this is where we see problems:
There is clear spiritual abuse. He is trying to force her to fit his calculus. He wants her to fit him. (But if he wanted a kind of theological orientation in a wife, he should have pursued one who had those characteristics from the outset rather than try to change her.) In this case, it is manipulation.
There is clear sexual abuse. This is not mere premarital sexual activity—that would be sin, but not abuse. No, he acts with entitlement. He forces a kiss on her; he approaches her from behind and feels her up; he uses her hand to fondle--even masturbate--him; he even continued this after he broke off the engagement.
The description reminded me of 2 things:
The way Ravi Zacharias molested the massage therapists;
The way Dr. Valerie Hobbs described the male privilege paradigm in her school life and college life: the men had the license, they were entitled to look at women a certain way, and all that mattered was their assessed ability to please the man.
Recently, Elisha confronted Dr. Payne via email. She included his elders in the correspondence. Payne responded, as did the elders.
My aim here is to assess that correspondence, as it constitutes crisis communication.
What is Image Repair?
When a politician or a pastor gets exposed in a major scandal--especially one of a sexual nature--it constitutes a crisis. It calls into question who they really are, and whether they can be trusted in their positions, and--no matter how sorry they are and however they may repair the damage they have done--whether they can ever be trusted in their current position again.
As a result, the response is often a form of crisis communication known as Image Repair. This is a peer-reviewed academic field of crisis communication.
Image Repair involves the use of various communication strategies that, when used defensively—serve to (1) elevate the status of the offender (BOLSTERING), (2) cast him as an agent of a higher cause (TRANSCENDENCE), (3) attack anyone attempting to hold him to account (Deny, Attack, Reverse Victim and Offender--also known as DARVO), (4) minimize the perceived severity of the offenses (MINIMIZATION). A heavy use of this kind of Image Repair is indicative of someone being self-serving, less-than-honest in his assessment of his actions, and often even malevolent.
There is a good kind of Image Repair: if an offender accepts unqualified responsibility and apologizes without imposing obligation on the victim (this is called MORTIFICATION), and seeks to take corrective action.
Even then, we must pay careful attention to the communication patterns when they do this, as offenders often can use apologies as weapons to wield over their victims, and as devices for manipulation of their target audience.
Now let's begin our analysis, starting with Dr. Payne's letter to Elisha.
This appears to be the beginning of MORTIFICATION, which would be a good and proper response. We'll come back to that later as this unfolds. But I'd like to call your attention to the red flag coming out of the gate: his first paragraph is very centered on himself: “your letter struck me…it grieves me.” This is a form of CASTING HIMSELF AS A VICTIM, which is a very underhanded Image Repair tactic. It actually makes the audience sympathetic to him.
That is very problematic, and as his response unfolds, you are going to see this reverberate.
What we see here is an example of CLAIMING GOOD INTENTIONS. It could be the truth, but it could also be a BOLSTERING tactic. And it can be both: in light of what we know to be true, he could be using something that is true in order to bolster himself.
This is MINIMIZATION. I'd like to point you to a major red flag: the use of passive voice. The use of passive voice weakens the effect of what is being said. Lawyers actually coach their clients to speak in passive voice when they are under cross-examination. If you remember the Watergate hearings and even the O.J. Simpson trial, you remember the line: “mistakes were made…”
His use of passive voice is a minimization tactic.
He's also minimizing by TRIANGULATION. In this tactic, one appeals to other people in order to bolster themselves or minimize their culpability. In this case, he's actually putting blame on HER (“our relationship”).
Here we see more minimization (“an immature soccer player/seminary student”). As you're going to see later, this is the beginning of a TEMPORAL DISTANCING strategy.
What is temporal distancing? Let's say you have an extramarital affair. Then 30 years later, you're successful, married, have a family, and are a Congressman overseeing the impeachment of a President over a matter related to his own sexual indiscretions. In the process, a major news service reveals your own past affair. If your response uses the length of time elapsed and you call it a “youthful indiscretion”, that's called temporal distancing. (I just described Rep. Henry Hyde (R-IL). And he was 41 years old at the time.)
Also, he is again casting himself as a victim (“I am struggling to remember many of the details…”). After all, it is difficult to hold him accountable for things he can't remember doing…
Here we have more temporal distancing: “I was young…” But what we are seeing also is a pattern of ATTACKING in the guise of MORTIFICATION. Notice that he has repeatedly asked for forgiveness. Asking for forgiveness is not an apology; it's a request! And given the Christian ethic--”forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us”--he is placing the spiritual burden on her to benefit him.
This is an example of three things:
BOLSTERING: he is elevating his life by pointing to his wife and children. He is elevating himself by pointing to his 21 years of marriage.
TRIANGULATION: he is using his wife and children to both bolster himself, and as human shields.
TRANSCENDENCE: he is calling attention to his repentance before God. While laudable, that has nothing to do with his standing with Elisha. The SIN was against God, but the abuse was against ELISHA. and Elisha is calling him out for his abuse against her, not her sin against God. He is using the high road shut her down and to deflect from the real issue that is now kicking him in the balls.
What we have here is very clear use of TRANSCENDENCE and BOLSTERING. He invokes ”our Heavenly Father's grace, through faith in Christ”, and points to how he has “loved my wife, children, family, friends…with purity, honor, and uprightness over the past twenty five years “ It is BOLSTERING (or shall I call it BOASTERING?), as he is boasting in his own righteousness. His calling attention to 25 years is a form of temporal distancing, as his abuses were 25 years ago. He expects 25 years of sterling life to atone for his abuses 25 years ago. That's heresy.
He's also underhandedly attacking Elisha by calling attention to “God's grace and faithfulness (which) have been at work in and through my life. I want others to know the grace and forgiveness that I've received…it is the heartbeat of my life, along with my wife, family, and congregation.”
He is using TRANSCENDENCE to attack Elisha, giving her a veiled warning that attacking him is attacking the very work of God! He is weaponizing God's forgiveness, he is weaponizing the Gospel, he is using his wife, his kids, and his church body, as human shields. (More TRIANGULATION)
Here we have FOUR MORE requests for forgiveness. Remember: these are not apologies! They are requests, even implicit demands. This is false mortification.
He also attacks Elisha by accusing her of hatred towards him. To hear him tell the story, he is innocent and SHE is the one who is spiritually In peril.
In other words, he is casting himself as the pure, righteous, honorable servant of the LORD who is being done in by this bitch who is dredging up some crap he can't even remember from 25 years ago. I don't believe him.
Conclusion: Dr. Payne is a phony.
Elisha: I believe you.
Well said, Tim.